Honoring lost loved ones (Thankful Thursdays)

It's times like weddings that make you realize how grateful you are for family and friends.  As much as I am starting to get a little nervous about the guest list now that our invites will be going out in a few weeks, it is so amazing to know that we have so many family and friends who want to share in our special day with us.

Our original guest list was about 300 on the extremely obnoxious side.  Our actual guest list is more like about 220-230 of those that we truly want to invite.  However, our venue (and our budget) can really only accommodate about 202 (200 guests of 10 people at 20 tables plus the two of us and a dance floor). 

So we are sending out invites to about 217 people and as the 'no responses' roll in, we will bump a few people up from our B list and send them out an invite.  That is assuming we get enough no's to do so.  And what if by some chance we don't get 15 no responses of those 217?  Oh man...then I'm stuck figuring out where to put an extra table or two at the reception (outside on the patio near the photobooth for a kids' table? behind the fireplace near the buffet? behind the DJ on the outside patio?) and having to come up with an extra $500-$750 for the caterer!  Ugh.

But I digress...today is about Thankful Thursdays and I am truly thankful for the people who have become or been an important part of our lives at one point or another who will come support Mr Fix It and I as we share our vows and our love with those we are honored to have attend.

However, there are also those who are truly truly important to us who will not be in attendance.  :(  Mr Fix It's mother passed away when he was in his early 30's - she had an unexpected heart attack. 

My own grandfather (right) passed away from heart problems during surgery when I was about 19 years old.  He was like a second father to me. 

I have also lost a paternal Aunt when I was about 10 years old and my paternal grandmother (left) died of cancer when I was very young.  These are people who Mr Fix It and I will definitely be thinking of come wedding day.  And so we wanted to honor their memory and share with our guests that their presence is definitely missed.

To do so, we created a special "In Memoriam" page on our wedding web site with dedications and photos.  In addition, we have decided to have a memorial table set up at the reception.  It will actually be next to the escort cards during the cocktail hour and then moved near the Photobooth for the remainder of the reception.  This table will have the following items on it:

*  Two vases:  A taller one engraved with the names of my grandfather, grandmother and Aunt and a shorter one engraved with the name of Mr Fix It's mother.  The shorter vase will have a floating candle in it and the taller vase will be filled with a bouquet of white tulips.  The taller one says "Lives of Love Remembered" and the shorter one reads "In Loving Memory."

* A digital photo frame:  Part of our package with our videographer includes a free digital photo frame they will load with photos we e-mail them.  We have decided to set this frame on the memorial table and fill it with photos of our lost loved ones.

* A memorial poem.  I found a poem online that we tweaked a little bit and printed up on some cardstock with a graphic design in our colors.  We will frame the poem and place it on the memorial table.  It reads as such:

We thought of you with love today,

But that is nothing new.

We thought of you yesterday

and the days before that, too.

We think of you in silence.

We often speak your name.

Now all we have are memories

and your picture in a frame.

Your memory is our keepsake,

with which we'll never part.

God has you in His keeping,

we have you in our hearts.

Makes me a little teary eyed just reading it.  Mr Fix It was very happy when I told him of the idea of a memorial table with vases and photos.  And my Aunt (my grandmother's daughter) was pretty teary eyed when she found out I was going to honor her sister and mother in this way.  It is something that we hope all of our guests will stop by and say a prayer as they think of both ours and their own loved ones. 

So ladies, what are your thoughts on a memorial of some sort?  Do you have a special way you are honoring your loved ones who are no longer with us? 

Budget brides: Don't forget to use your wedding coupons!

So over the summer I was having SO much fun purchasing all of the little things online.  Here's what I have so far:
* Black Gloss Gable Boxes for Out of Town Guest Gift Bags

* My Memorial Vases courtesy of Jean M products (a small one for my fiance's mother and the larger one for my grandmother, grandfather and aunt)

  

* My toasting flutes courtesy of Get Married's shop

* Bridesmaid Gifts:  Jewelry Rolls (from Amazon.com) and Blue Parasols

 

   

* My Guestbook (Super excited about this fun idea from a previous blog post)

 

* Favor boxes (chinese takeout boxes) from http://www.papermart.com/

I made all of these purchases online and I always suggest taking plenty of time to browse the internet and see what you can do to 'bargain shop.'  But here are my latest tidbits of advice for wedding shopping:

Use the net and use your coupons!

That's right, I said coupons.  I recently discovered that you can do a google search for coupon codes by putting in the store name and the words 'promo code'.  I was able to get free shipping and save 5%  by using an online coupon I found and I saved 10% off my Guestbook by using a code that I found online.

Another great site I used to find a lot of my little detail items is http://www.thefind.com/. This site will let you type in a description or item name and it will bring up literally hundreds of stores online that are selling the items.  Don't get me wrong, it takes some leg work to find the best deal...I found a site that had my favors for 88 cents each but once I saw what the shipping costs were, the site was actually not that cheap. But I did find a site to buy my placecards from!  Definitely play with this site.

And I already mentioned in a previous post about why it's a good idea to buy items sooner than later for your wedding needs.  But another reason it's a good idea to start shopping sooner than later is that once you decide what you want, you can take your time browsing the net and your fave sites for when sales come up.

I listed a lot of information above because these are sites that I have found have the best deals for a lot of items that many of you may need...trying to save you some leg work.  The gable boxes for example - I bought 50 of them from this supplier rather than the 25 I would probably need because it was actually cheaper to buy more from a wholesale supplier than to try to buy the amount I needed from gift stores and such.

So ladies - any other suggestions for how to bargain shop?