Our proposal on one of the saddest days of my life

I was never one of those girls to want to start questioning her boyfriend as to when 'we were gonna get married' or start talking about marriage. I just always trusted that God would work it out if it was meant to be...though after almost 5 years together, I was starting to get antsy.

October, 2008 was a turning point in our relationship. In Cabo, he told me he loved me for the very FIRST time after having dated for almost 5 years!  Wait, I need to do a little time out from the proposal story:

What I love most about him is the fact that he told me in the beginning of our dating relationship that he would never tell another woman he loved her until he was ready to put a ring on her finger. I began telling John I loved him a few years ago, but I never wanted him to say it back. The day he finally said I love you to me (which was in October, 2008 in Cabo), I knew that we were going to be together forever. I never needed to hear the words from him...John always lets me know how much he loves me with his actions and in subtle ways that God has allowed me to appreciate so deeply.

Us in Cabo (Oct 2008) visiting the wedding chapel...

little did we know we'd be looking for venues only 2 months later!

So anyway, in Cabo, while walking down the beach with not another soul around (except for the person who took this picture right before we started our stroll) he told me he loved me for the very first time and he also shared that he could completely envision spending his life with me. One night after we returned from Cabo, while we were cuddling watching tv, John simply said to me: "So I guess we should start looking at wedding venues probably." In his own way, it was how he let me know that the proposal was forthcoming.

In some ways I feel like John proposed several times because over the next few weeks, John would often bring up wedding comments and talk of me being his wife soon. He started talking about remodeling his home to prepare for me and my daughter, Jordan moving in and stuff like that. I would nod or smile or make a simple comment in response but didn't really make a huge issue of it. However, within a month I started booking appointments at wedding venues for us to start trying to get together a timeline and budget needs. And in December we began to shop for wedding rings.

A lot of our family started asking why we were making these plans without officially being engaged, but I knew that we were heading towards the inevitable question so it didn't bother me.

Christmas morning 2008: John knew that my mom and I were pretty bummed about the fact that we were going to be spending the first Christmas of our entire lives away from my sister, Julie. I mean I was really sad.  In my 36 years I had spent the 34 years that I had my baby sister with her on every single holiday of our entire lives!  And to top it off, my Grandma, who is always with us on Christmas morning was getting tired in her 93rd year and had decided to spend Christmas morning in her own home. So we spent a much quieter Christmas morning with just my mom, John, Jordan and I.

As we started to open stockings, John directed me to a box of Godiva chocolates he brought with him. He told me to open them because he bought them for me (he prefers See's Candy over Godiva). When I opened the box, I noticed a note wrapped around something. I unwrapped the note and out popped a ring. The note was short but sweet; it simply read:

I love you and you're always so sweet to me. We have so much fun together so why not spend a lifetime like this? Will you marry me?

I knew the proposal was coming (I mean we had already shopped for rings) so I didn't think I'd be too emotional, but suddenly I found myself completely choked up with tears rolling down my cheeks. My mom looked over at me and asked me why I was crying. I held up my hand with the ring on it and she immediately started getting choked up and fighting back tears. As I looked at John and leaned to kiss him I think I managed to squeeze out the words "Of course" but they sure didn't come easy since I could barely speak.

My beautiful ring:

My mom thanked John for letting her be a part of the experience and he told me later that he really wanted to make sure my family and specifically Jordan was a part of the proposal. Of course, my sister was not happy when I texted her an image of the ring on my finger and she realized that the first Christmas she had ever been away from her family her big sister gets proposed to - and she wasn't there!

Some pics right after the proposal on Christmas morning:

So the man of my dreams made the hardest Christmas in my life the most memorable one and I will be forever thankful to God for giving John the heart to provide me with a thoughtful and loving surprise.